Men’s Blog

It is the night you’ve been waiting for, everything is perfect and you are ready to settle down to some serious lovemaking. You have set the mood with a candlelight dinner, romantic music playing on the radio and lights dimmed down low. She is just as thrilled and aroused as you. Now both of you undress, engage in some heavy foreplay, exploring each other’s bodies and finally she allows you to penetrate her. Suddenly, with great abandon, chills run up and down your spine and within seconds you ejaculate and lose your erection.

She looks at you not so much surprised as with disdain. Is this for real? You must be kidding me! You lay in bed exhausted and embarrassed. She puts on her clothes and lights up a cigarette in silence. You realize that you ruined the whole experience for her and most likely any chance of making love to her again in the future.

So what went wrong? You had no control of your orgasm and ejaculated prematurely. Why does this happen? Why can’t you control yourself more? The embarrassment makes you think twice about having sex again in fear of more embarrassing outcomes.

Not to worry, you are not alone. It is estimated that forty to forty-five percent of all males around the world have this problem. It afflicts young men more often, but it can extend into adulthood if nothing is done about it when you are younger.

Premature ejaculation loosely defined is the inability to hold off your orgasm long enough for your partner to orgasm and it can ruin your lovemaking. Among casual partners it is sure to leave the woman with a lousy impression of your sexual performance. There most likely will not be second time. In serious relationships and with married couples, it leads to a stressful unhappy sex life that easily lead to extramarital affairs, separation and divorce.

But cheer up. There is hope. It’s not as if the condition is incurable.

It takes some determination to really take control and end this problem. You must realize that you have a problem and be committed to fixing it. Only then will you be able to learn how to last longer in bed. Many men do not and are too selfish to understand that having sex is not meant to only be satisfying to him. Really if that is all sex is about, he could just masturbate!

Next, he needs to seek professional help. There are self-help suggestions in books and on the Internet about the subject. Premature ejaculation has its roots either physiologically or psychologically. Understanding the problem often needs outside help with the proper expertise.

Having a sex partner who understands you and is sympathetic to your concerns can lead to a much faster improvement. A partner who loves you should be more than willing to help in any way they can. However it is your problem and you are the one that needs to commit to fixing it.

Physiologically, premature orgasms can often be traced to a hypersensitive penis. Wearing condoms can lessen the sensation and help you last longer. There are also desensitizing creams one can apply over the glans to minimize the sensitivity and help you prolong your orgasm.

Psychologically, experts often trace some mental and emotional roots to the problem. Creating a relaxed and stress-free atmosphere during lovemaking has been known to mitigate premature orgasm. And so does hypnosis.

Bottom line is you can correct yourself and premature ejaculation can be controlled. The only thing you need to do is to recognize it and seek help.

Tag:getting it all wrong in bed, premature ejaculation

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